Thursday, March 16, 2006

The Doctor Made Me Lose It

Well, I went on my second date with the doctor (did I mention he’s a doctor?) last night. We ended up making out. It was very nice. Nothing else happened. Then tonight, we made out again, and I lost something in my pants – it wasn’t my keys or chapstick. Needless to say, he didn’t lose anything. Only the amateur was unable to keep things in check. Grrr.

I’m still trying to process my feelings. This happened only 30 minutes ago or so. I think tomorrow I’ll have a better grasp on how I feel. To be honest, I feel a little guilty, but not a ton – perhaps because I’m rationalizing my guilt away right now. I do know that I need to slow things down ... a lot.

Though we remained fully clothed throughout our make-out session, our hands were roaming (fortunately only over levis – not under). I guess I am regretting doing that. I just feel like a third date is too quick. I feel like I gave in. If I feel this way after tonight, I don’t even want to imagine what I’m going to feel like after we actually do something. I may have to stop things altogether because I don’t know if “slowing” is even possible.

Anyhow, I’ll post something tomorrow describing how I feel 24 hours after the fact.

3 Comments:

Blogger Elbow said...

I know how you feel. I have been in your position before and it's hard to sort out all of the feelings involved. All of it can be a little overwhelming.
Maybe it is too quick for your. If anything, let him know that you like him but also mention that this is new for you and you want to take things really really slow. He should understand. If he is a great guy, and if he cares about you then he will make sure he doesn't cross any bounds that you don't want him to.

Don't feel guilty. I know that is harder said than done, but take stock of the fact that you are going through a learning experience right now.
You're ok. I'm sure you will feel a little better after some time passes. You really are a good person, and there is no need to worry if you did something wrong because you didn't

5:48 AM  
Anonymous Scott said...

I think the guilt comes from crossing a line that you set for yourself.

What you should do is talk about it to the Doctor. Elbow has the right of it, if he and stand up guy, he will not want to tempt you into betraying yourself.

And while cutting off contact with the Doctor is a possiblity, I hope your choice will be communication instead of silence.

And this sound stupid, since we're only talking on the internet, but I will support in whatever choice you decide on. If you're not ready, you're not ready.

11:19 AM  
Anonymous Chip said...

I don't think there's anything to feel guilty about. For the first time in your life you have been brought to orgasm--which is pleasurable--by another human being. You are worrying that this may have happened too soon,because it's only your third date. If you two like each opther and like what you're doing, what is the harm? And as to whether it is "too soon," one can argue that because you are already 24, and most Amercan males aee experiencing orgasms with others on dates in their late teens, it is hardly too soon. It is new. And takes getting used to. But for Pete's sake, someone you liked was making you feel good (and vice bersa). Don't try to turn a nice thing into something else. You guys had a good time. With more experirnce, the guilt wil;l pass. And hopefully he can help you with that... Good luck, CHIP

9:20 PM  

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